Friday 25 July 2014

Me ferst blog post!

I hab be’d in me noo home for FOR hole munfs and Mummy hab telled me praps I shood hab a blog like wot me angel bruvva did. Mummy sez praps I shood rite down me longer forts (shood I eva hab a long fort wibout getting distracted by sumfing un-fortful – like mugs. I lub mugs. Speshally wen thems in me mouf). So I finked wibout getting distracted that wood be’s probly best to start from the beginning. Before Mummy taked meself home I had neva be’d in a home before.


Wen you ferst gets home, everyfing be’s different. No kennels. No uvva hounds (unless you’s now got ‘doptid bruvvas and sistas). You hab to acqwaint youself wib ebryfing. And you hab ROOLS! Rools meen you hab to fink and sumtimes it be’s difficult to fink becoz of fings like mugs. You’s ferst day wib you’s hoomans will probly go a bit likes this:


Run around like a sooper mad fing. Wees hup the table (or if you ham a gerl do wee’s on the rug). Grab the cushons, frow them about. Pick up anyfing wot looks hinteresting. Hides it. Hintroduce youself to the tellybox wevver man. Put you’s feets on EVRYFING. Look out the window. Put you’s feets on the window. Run around some mores. Do wee’s outside. Pick hup mugs. Stores them. Wurry you’s noo name is ‘Leave’ becoz that be’s a stoopid name. Hintroduce youself to the naybers by putting you’s feets on the fence and going boing! Sqwiggle you’s wite (or any uvva culler) fluffs all ova the rug. Heventually be hexzorstid and allow noo hooman to show you you’s bed. Snooze. Wakes hup. Follow hooman around. Ded sumfing else. Collect more fings. Do wee’s outside. Go walkies. Wurry about evryfing: cars, lorries, hooge wite ducks, uvva dogs - speshally small ones wot is like wabbits but wot is like dogs at the same time. Hooge confoozion! Say hello to evry hooman you meet becoz in kennels evryone sez hello. Wurry agen that you’s name mite hactually be called ‘Leave’. Follow hooman around. Snooze. Get taked hupstairs. Worry about the hooge mowntin. Neerly fall down leeping hup. Find beds! Sqwiggle all ova beds. Run round sooper fast. Make the cushons ded.

Heventually you’s noo hooman tells you to settle down in you’s bed for long snoozes. You wakes hup a cupple of times in the nite becoz it be’s a bit wurrying not being wib a millyon uvva houndies in kennels (and there be’s mugs) but afta a little wile you relax.


You’s next day duzn’t be’s qwite so wurrying (once you’s got ova the wurry of coming back down the hooge mowntin). Ova the next few days you will start to feel a bit more cumfy. You will no’s you’s name is not Leeve but hactually Arfur. And you will lern the rools: wot you can eats and wot you can ded and wot you habs to leeve (likes cushons). So hinsted of cushons being sooper good fun thems just sits about doing nuffing. Boring. You will lern that hoomans is a bit funnies like that. Thems cushons is preshus. Sumtimes you can ded them tho went thems not looking. If thems duzn’t see you you can blame the wind. Then you hab you’s rooteen. I lub rooteen, you no’s wot you’s ment to do wen.

To be continoo'd... 

  

9 comments:

  1. well done Arfa!! that's a good start to tell other houndies that might be going to new forever homes what to look out for

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  2. Good insight to you observations Arthur.

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  3. What a lovely first post Arthur - looking forward to many more

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  4. Ahhh. You is a good boy Arfur...

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  5. A smashing first blog, Arthur. I look forward to many more....it would be rood not to, now wouldn't it? x0x

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  6. Great job, Arfur! Can't wate unteel yer nex won!

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  7. Yippee doo dah, thats a great blog Arfur you bees a writer soon like your bootiful Angel Bruva xxx hugs

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  8. I really enjoyed your first blog post :-)

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